The Girl Guides saved me from myself

I am standing by the coat racks in my local church hall in Putney. If I close my eyes, I can still smell the distinct odour of damp wool coats and hear the shout of the captain calling out “Bluebirds, into your corners!” It was my first Girl Guide meeting. The year was 1972 and I was 11 years old.

Looking back, one may forget specific details of our younger years, who was number one in the charts or when I bought my wet-look maxi coat, but the underlying feelings stay with you forever. When I joined the Girl Guides, I never expected it to become such a defining and joyful part of my life. And despite recent debates over new policies, such as a new modernised, relaxed uniform, I am delighted that Girlguiding UK, as it is now known, continues to thrive.

I was a far more rebellious child than an obedient one. Being naughty wasn’t about being mean; it was just the antithesis of being bored. I remember one morning, my best friend Melissa and I decided that bunking off school to walk along the Putney towpath sounded much better than a classroom. Unfortunately, we sank into the Thames mud, panicking and crying until a kind gentleman pulled us out.

After many more incidents, including spending more time outside the Head Mistress’s office than actually learning, my parents had had enough. So when Melissa’s mum brought up the idea of the Girl Guides, my mother didn’t hesitate – she went straight out and bought the uniform. It was that or being grounded.

Are you having as much sex as everyone else?

It’s natural for libido to wax and wane due to life events, dating status or hormonal changes.

And it can be hard to say what a “normal” sexual frequency is. But research and case studies give us a rough idea.

The statistics

When it happens

61%

 A 2023 survey concluded that almost two thirds (61 per cent) of us wait until night-time to have sex.

Only 14 per cent opt to get busy in the early evening, and 10 per cent in the morning.

 Research from 2019 suggests that the average number of times British live-in or married couples have sex per month is three. 

Are Gen Z having less sex than older people?

I see my partner on the weekends and have sex with others in the week.

Leanne, a 27-year-old influencer from Bristol has sex three or four times a week, but only sees her long-distance partner on the weekends. They have agreed they can both sleep with other people during the week.

35-year-old Rebecca usually sleeps with her partner once or twice per week due to not having much child-free time.

Clare, 32, says her job is busy and she has to schedule sex with her partner on weekends, or some afternoons twice a month. “Occasionally this slips and I do worry that it makes us not as connected,” she says.

I haven’t had the issue of my sex life drying up with menopause. I’m more aroused now.

I’ve been married for 15 years. I love my husband, but our sex life is non-existent, and has been for about five years.

I’m not really motivated to seek out partners; I vaguely like the idea of it but not enough to take any action.

I’ve been married for 20 years and sex has become something of a rarity. We maybe have sex once a week on a Sunday morning as we’re both relaxed and I can take Viagra late on Saturday night – without it, I can’t perform.

JACK, 63, OFFICE WORKER, KENT
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The seven rules that could save your marriage

Keep your sense of self

I did what I thought I was supposed to do and forgot my needs and wants. I think it’s really important that you’re an individual and not just a person who is married.

KATIE STRATFORD*, A 55-YEAR-OLD MUM OF TWO, WHO DIVORCED ATER 19 YEARS
A married couple sitting in silence, looking in opposite directions. The image captures the concept of female loneliness within a marriage, emotional disconnection, and relationship problems. Symbolizes quiet desperation and isolation at home

Seven rules to save your marriage

The small things

Small things, like being brought a cup of tea or saying thank you, make a big difference.

Karen Deulofeu, who ended her six-year marriage, believes all couples should seek support, even before they think they need it.

Female psychiatrist discussing with mid adult woman during therapy session - stock photo
Young couple in serious discussion with mental health professional during marriage counseling session sit on sofa in living room at home. Therapy session and mental health concept.

Listen properly by repeating what you have heard and ask if you’ve got that right.

Don’t lose communication

People don’t talk about the deep issues; nobody else is going to do it for you. You don’t want to ask questions because it might rock the boat…you have to keep talking, and talk about what it is that you want within the relationship to keep going forward.

KATIE STRATFORD

Seven rules to save your marriage

Remember that things change

“What you see on social media and what friends say is quite often the nice version. Everything is a phase,” says Deulofeu.

Unhappy elderly couple sitting on a sofa together after arguing. Senior caucasian man and woman looking stressed and ready for divorce
A senior couple spend time in an indoor sunny market. The woman looks through a clothes on a rail as her husband waits patiently behind her.

Look at yourself first

“Focus on what’s in your control and what you can do differently, rather than the other person or a situation that you can’t control. Invest in understanding yourself,” she adds.

There are things that all mid-life men should know about keeping their hearts healthy.

From eating more purple fruit to avoiding large bowls of pasta, consultant cardiologist Dr Zoe Astroulakis [below] shares her simple lifestyle habits she wishes her patients would take on board.

Positive changes to make

Swap ‘bad’ fats for healthy ones

You don’t need to eat a fat-free diet; the key is to reduce your saturated fat. Reduce your dairy and swap your red meat for lean meat such as chicken and oily fish.

Shopping basket full of grocery products, food and drink on yellow background. 3d illustration
man eating fried chicken

Control your portions

You don’t need more carbohydrates in a meal than you can fit in your hand. Enormous plates of pasta can cause blood sugar spikes, which can lead to health problems.

Positive changes to make

A handful of harvested blueberries in the Fruit and Vegetable Garden at RHS Garden Rosemoor. Image via Image via Guy Barter

Look for purple

Blueberries, black grapes and aubergines are great for boosting “good” cholesterol.

Have oats

Porridge is one of the healthiest breakfast options because it’s full of soluble fibre.

Oatmeal porridge with banana blueberry and walnuts in ceramic bowl. Top view. Grey concrete table background. Healthy eating, dieting concept
Young girl buying drugs inside of night club at party time.

Stop taking cocaine

It can provoke a massive heart attack, even in younger people who don’t have existing artery problems.

Stay below the alcohol limit

Middle aged bearded man sitting in a bar and drinking fresh cold light beer. It's time to relax after work. Always have a little time for yourself.
  • The NHS guidelines of 14 units per week is still more than 1,000 additional calories.
  • The safest level to aim for is zero.
  • If you’re drinking, make sure you have some alcohol-free days each week and space it out.

5 min read

Positive changes to make

Do cardio too

Don’t only focus on lifting weights. It might make you look toned, but it says nothing about the health of your heart. 

Close-up view of female jogger tying laces of her sport shoes before running exercise routine. Motivation, healthy lifestyle and fitness concept.

Check your levels

You can get free blood pressure checks in many pharmacies or you can buy a monitor for around £30 to use at home.

Avoid night shifts

It disrupts the body’s circadian rhythm and can lead to increased cholesterol.

Engineers from a Thames Water leak hunting team unloads equipment from their van during a night shift in London. (Photographer: Jose Sarmento Matos/Bloomberg via Getty Images

A sign to look out for

A beer belly is a sign you need to make urgent changes

glasses of Real ale beer on bar in traditional English pub

It’s usually a sign you’re drinking too much. By the time your belly starts to bulge, it’s a sign that you’re consuming excess calories and storing too much fat internally.

3 min read

Want a new career but worried it’s too late?

Mid-life is not too late to start again, says experienced recruiter Elizabeth Willetts [below].

Here, Willetts shares the best jobs to switch to during midlife if you want a change – without sacrificing pay.

Changing careers in your fifties

Mid-life career pivots can lead to higher earnings. 

7.4%

According to the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development, workers aged 45 to 54 who voluntarily pivot jobs see an average wage growth of 7.4 per cent.

3.5%

And those aged 55 to 64 still see a 3.5 per
cent increase. 

The AARP Global Employee Survey also found that over half of workers who changed jobs voluntarily experienced improvements in work flexibility and mental health.

So what job options are there?

Virtual assistant

As a virtual assistant your workload will be very varied and it could be anything from tidying inboxes, booking travel, sending invoices or updating spreadsheets.

Online travel booking. Teleworking. Online shopping and e-commerce.
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You can start out earning around £20 to £35 an hour, but it can scale into agency work, launch support or even project management. Some earn very well.

Male candidate handshake with the recruiter at job interview - stock photo

What it involves

You will source, screen and interview candidates to match them with the right job roles.

Who it’s for

You don’t need any qualifications but it’s suited to communicators and commercially-minded people. 

Rearview female recruitment reading and checking resume in hands interviewing and hiring woman candidate for joи near laptop in office with glass windows - stock photo

The pay

The salary van vary from £25 to £50k, but you can earn around £100k depending on commission.

Jobs to switch to in your fifties

Male Real Estate Agent With Digital Tablet Carrying Out Valuation On Property For Renovation

Estate agent

It offers flexible hours and weekend staff can earn £15 per hour. 

This form of coaching for businesses could earn around £250 to £1,000 per day.

portrait of confident senior business man holding digital tablet in modern office
A candidate confidently presents their resume during a job interview with a panel of professionals. Company owner on a meeting with employee. Middle aged businesswoman in a conversation with a colleague. Lawyer consulting client during formal meeting. Job interview and hiring process.

In the lower end, a sales rep can make £30k and on the higher end £50-60k, plus commission.

Why coaching is a good option

Coaching is incredibly varied and can be anything from career coaching, to confidence and leadership coaching. 

  • As it is an unregulated industry, you don’t need qualifications but the more reputable option is the International Coaching Federation.
  • It’s a great career option for older people because clients genuinely value your wealth of life experience.
  • It’s flexible, scalable, and you can start doing it part-time alongside another role.
  • It could make you anything from £200 an hour, all the way up to £500 p/h+.
staff nurse consulting ward doctor

This can be across HR, operations, marketing, finance, people strategy or project management, as it’s varied.

Price on value, not hours – if your advice saves a client £200k, charging £150 an hour undersells what you’re worth.

Do some foods leave
you feeling hungry rather than satiated? Experts say there are…

Foods that leave you hungrier

A bowl of cereal and glass of orange juice

More refined cereals are digested quickly, and fruit juice, whilst one of your five-a-day, contains less fibre than whole fruit. This might mean you find yourself hungry again within 1-2 hours of eating this breakfast.

Woman eating colored breakfast cereal in front of laptop, workplace breakfast, quick healthy breakfast in office in the morning.

Swap the orange juice for a whole orange, the cereal for oats and milk or serve it with Greek yoghurt or a boiled egg. This would increase the fibre and protein content; two nutrients strongly linked with fullness.

Foods that leave you hungrier

Gail's croissant Image taken from https://gails.com/collections/breakfast/products/croissant

These pastries are made primarily from refined flour and butter, and are relatively low in protein and fibre.

Toast and jam

Toasted bread and white background
FILE PHOTO: Pufferfish sushi line is seen on a display window at a market in Shimonoseki, Japan February 7, 2020. Picture taken on February 7, 2020. REUTERS/Sakura Murakami/File Photo

Shop-bought packs can contain a lot of white rice, which is digested quickly, and the protein content is often modest.

Foods that leave you hungrier

Sarawak laksa is one of many varieties of this noodle soup (Photo: Tham Kee Chuan/Getty)

Vegetable soup

On its own, it is often very low in protein and calories, so hunger can return quickly.

Unless it’s loaded with veggies, it’s probably pretty low in fibre.

WASHINGTON, DC - AUGUST 12: Chocolate Milkshake Smoothies photographed for Food in Washington, DC on August 12, 2024 (Photo by Scott Suchman for The Washington Post via Getty Images; food styling by Lisa Cherkasky for The Washington Post via Getty Images)

Liquids are generally less filling as they require little chewing which may not trigger satiety signals.

Foods that leave you hungrier

London, convenience store, snacks and sweets. (Photo by: Jeffrey Greenberg/Education Images/Universal Images Group via Getty Images)

Snack bars

They are ideal for a quick pick-me-up, but if reducing hunger is what you’re after, it’d be better to swap it out.

Low-fat yoghurt

A full-fat plain Greek yoghurt with berries and seeds tends to be much more filling due to the protein, fat and fibre.

Which yoghurts are the best options? (Unsplash)
BANGKOK, THAILAND - OCTOBER 17: A "KT Herbalist", a Kratom cocktail made from Kratom, coffee and siamese herbs is seen at Teens of Thailand, a bar in Bangkok's Chinatown on October 17, 2021 in Bangkok, Thailand. In April 2021, the start of Thailand's third and most deadly wave of the COVID-19 pandemic, the Thai government banned the sale of alcohol in restaurants and bars, crippling the already suffering food and beverage industry. With a lack of government aid and support, some bars have shuttered their doors in hopes of reopening post-lockdown, while others shuttered their doors for good. But six months into Thailand's most recent lockdown, Niks Anuman-Rajadhon, owner of Teens of Thailand, a gin bar located in a renovated shophouse in Bangkok's Chinatown, decided that instead of waiting for the government to allow the sale of alcohol again, they would take advantage of Thailand's recent legalization of Kratom. Kratom is a locally grown herbal drug with mild opioid and stimulant effects and was reclassified from a type-5 narcotic to a legal-to-grow herb in August 2021. While Thailand prepares for a tentative reopening on November 1st, the alcohol ban and curfew are set to continue, leaving business owners questioning if the country can revive its suffering tourism industry. (Photo by Lauren DeCicca/Getty Images)

On an empty stomach, it can actually increase your appetite.

What to eat instead

Instead of thinking about avoiding foods, think about what you can add to them.

  • Add beans, lentils or shredded chicken to your vegetable soup and pasta.
  • Thicken your smoothies with Greek yoghurt, chia seeds and oats.
  • Apple slices with peanut butter, yogurt with berries and hummus with oat biscuits are better snack options than a pre-made snack bar.
  • Have alcohol alongside a balanced meal containing protein and fibre.

How to age well
without pain

Will Harlow, a physiotherapist
for the over-50s and author of Independence for Life, shares
the key signs you’re ageing
badly – and what to do about it.

How to know

Ageing well is maintaining the ability to do what you want you want for as long as you want without needing help. Everyone is talking about longevity but what’s the point in living longer if the last decade is painful and you’re [totally] reliant on people?”

The signs to look out for

Senior woman on sofa feeling and suffering from back pain. - stock photo
  • The most obvious early warning sign of bad ageing is pain says Harlow. 
  • Another is losing confidence in doing daily tasks, which can quickly lead to a lack of independence.
  • One call Harlow often receives is people calling after having a fall and struggling to get up.

4 min read

How to age without pain

Not just stopping

When people retire, they often put their feet up and stop. Your body really is use it or lose it.

Throughout our entire lives, Harlow says we need between seven and nine hours of sleep.

Tired mature woman taking a nap on the sofa in the living room
Maribel Ezcurra, 77, a retired milling machine mechanic, practices tai chi with fellow seniors in a park in the Playa neighborhood of Havana, Cuba, Wednesday, April 15, 2026. (AP Photo/Ramon Espinosa)

Social isolation

The lack of connection can increase the risk of premature death by
as much as 29 per cent.

Strength training

It really is the proxy for
overall independence.

The more muscle mass you have, the less chance of heart disease, diabetes, falls and even anxiety, depression and dementia. 

This is a photo of a senior man helping his wife lift weights. See PA Feature HEALTH Physio. WARNING: This picture must only be used to accompany PA feature HEALTH Physio. PA Photo.Picture credit should read: Alamy/PA. NOTE TO EDITORS: This picture must only be used to accompany PA Feature HEALTH Physio.

The brain can be linked to muscle mass too, Harlow says. It’s not just about being able to lift things. It gives you more energy, better sleep and you’ll look and feel better.

How to age without pain

Daily habits

Do short bursts of exercise, between 30 and 60 seconds, in otherwise dead time during the day.

Elderly woman exercising in a public park
A mature man rouses in the early morning light, stretching as he wakes.

Stretch in bed

Take joints through a full range of motion for five minutes to loosen it before getting up.

Don’t crash diet

A woman adds up food calorie counts in her kitchen

How to age without pain

Protein shake and chocolate protein powder in a scoop, Sports nutrition.

Harlow advises 1.6 grams per kilogram of body weight to stop muscle loss alongside resistance training.

Don’t wait

Harlow finds that many patients put off making a change to their lifestyle until their lives are consumed by pain. 

Menstrual pain, woman with stomachache suffering from pms at home, endometriosis, cystitis and other diseases of the urinary system - stock photo
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For most people, it’s about reducing the number of times per week you’re exercising, not reducing intensity. 

The three ageing tests to do

  • Lie completely flat on the floor and get back up to a standing position using any technique. This should take less than 10 seconds.

  • See how many times you can sit on the chair and stand back up again in 30 seconds. Men should be aiming for more than 14 times and women 12. 

  • The single-leg stand, which involves standing on one leg and balancing for 10 seconds. Everyone should be able to do that and for those under 65, Harlow asks them to do it with their eyes closed.

Despite the job market hiring fewer entry-level roles, employers are still looking for grads…

But you should be prepared to keep an open mind.

We’ve compiled the sectors hiring graduate roles, what degree is required, and what they pay.

Young adults in graduation gowns joyfully tossing caps into the sky, celebrating achievement and new beginnings against a clear backdrop

The degrees to choose for a career

Hiring in the UK could
finally be on the up

47%

of employers offered entry-level
positions from July.

That is up nearly 15 per cent from the same period last year.

700,000

But graduate unemployment rose to six per cent in 2025 and 700,000 jobless graduates were claiming benefits.

Finance and insurance

  • Around 42 per cent of UK finance and insurance employers say they will be open to graduate roles this summer.
  • Business loan company Portman Finance Group has taken on 50 graduates over the past four years.
A lot of thought needs to be put into transferring a DB pension to a DC pot

Portman graduates start on £36,000 for the two-year programme and the education you need to apply is a minimum “ABB” of A-levels, and a 2:1 or above university degree. But not in a specific subject.

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Trade and logistics

What makes it particularly rewarding is that there’s always something to learn.

Nearly half (47 per cent) of trade and logistics companies will be giving graduates a go this year.

Salaries start at £30,000 with an uncapped bonus, rising to £50,000 plus a company car as a senior account partner.

Technology and IT

More than half (52 per cent) of UK tech and IT firms are actively looking for graduates. 

Successful entry-level candidates can earn a basic salary of up to £35,000, with the opportunity to triple that within their first three years of working.

Young business woman searching for job online. Woman writing resume on laptop.

4 min read

Public sector, health
and social services 

46 per cent of public sector, health and social services organisations are also ready to take graduates, according to a survey by Manpower. 

A policeman walking away from an elderly person's home. - stock photo
  • For example, Police Now runs a graduate programme into policing. They recruit graduates from any degree field, as long as they achieve a 2:2 or above. Starting salaries range from £31,164 to £42,210 depending on location and rising each year.

Can we treat guests without blowing our budget?

According to Waitrose, a dinner party revival is underway led by younger people trying to reduce the cost of getting together.

Always have bread

People will feast on the
bread, and then need less fish/steak/expensive whatever. All small plates restaurants know this: this is why the first thing on the menu is always artisan bread and butter.

ELLA RISBRIDGER, AUTHOR OF THE KITCHEN BOOK – GOOD FOOD FOR EVERY DAY
Female Hands cutting bread. - stock photo

Use vegetables as centrepieces

Variety Fresh of organic fruits and vegetables and healthy vegan meal ingredients in reusable eco cotton bags on beige background . Zero waste shopping concept. Healthy food, clean eating, eco friendly, no plastic. Flat lay, top view - stock photo
Beautiful woman unpacks a full fabric bag with fruits and vegetables on the kitchen. - stock photo


Add pantry items

Graham’s recipes include a braised cabbage with a preserved lemon sauce, a roast cauliflower with saffron, and harrisa roast carrots with mango labneh.

How to host on a budget

Table top view of Indian food.

Improve the everyday

Guests will always appreciate a stellar interpretation of the ordinary. Think lasagna or curry.

Cooking dinner for your guests is spoiling them – you’re being generous with your time, your effort, and your home. So don’t feel the need to go overboard elsewhere.

A group of friends is toasting together during a dinner party. They are smiling, celebrating together.
Man serving friends salad at backyard dinner party - stock photo

Ask for help

Ask friends to bring a contribution, be it a nibble or a pudding.

Big platter energy

[Presentation] can be the key to elevating something . Spaghetti and tomato sauce suddenly looks like a feast when tumbled on a lovely big plate, dressed with olive oil and parmesan and placed in the middle of the table.

Food writer and editor Eleanor Steafel 

How to host on a budget

Taco party

Have one expensive filling, like shredded chicken, and two cheaper options, like refried beans, says Ella Risbridger.

Traditional ice cream parlours are still going strong (Shutterstock)
Tacos are a popular dish throughout the country (Photo: Daniela White Images/Getty)

Shop-bought ice cream is so easily zhuzhed up with the help of handy toppings, says Eleanor Steafel.

The Girl Guides were instrumental in rounding off a few of the sharp edges of my personality and providing a much-needed layer of guidance and structure.

Our meetings were on Friday, bridging the gap between Top of the Pops the night before and the weekend. When the time came, Melissa and I head to that church hall. At the beginning, we found flouting the rules more fun than listening.

A case in point was the hostess badge. It required poise and social etiquette. Instead, our inner anarchist burst forth, and instead of conforming, Melissa and I started throwing bread rolls across the room. All the girls joined in and the chaos was legendary. When we gathered in a horseshoe to recite the Guide Law, standing there in my blue uniform, with my yellow cross over tie and beret, my natural instinct was to giggle, poke Melissa, or quietly mock the earnestness of the promises we were making.

But the reaction of our Guide leader to our mischief is something I will never forget. She gave us a proper telling-off, but instead of shaming us, she told us that while it was okay to want to have fun, learning these things was a real skill, and she was going to teach us how to do it. Her mixture of firm boundaries and warmth won me over. She got me to conform, but more importantly, she got me to enjoy it. I think this was the turning point for me. I always responded to reason – I wasn’t a proud or stubborn child, and it made sense to my 11-year-old self. She made it feel okay to fit in, something I always thought was boring. It was not. From then on, I became the child who learned to love it.

It was easier back then – phones, social media, and computers didn’t exist to hijack our minds and our souls. Our time was spent on what was wholesome and good. Instead of being glued to an iPad in the evening like kids today, we were learning by experience, actually doing stuff with our hands. We all read the and felt like treasure hunters roaming the countryside. Girl Guides and adventure stories not only fed the imagination, but I grew to love the outdoor fun and camaraderie.

We were encouraged to try physical activities like climbing – skills that back then were usually reserved for boys. Not to mention, we carried proper knives with sheaths on our Girl Guide belts, with no health and safety stifling our natural, adventurous selves. You saw this most during the annual summer camp, when our three or four patrol groups were sent down to a wide-open field in the countryside. There were no pre-assembled pop-up tents; we had to work as a team to build those large, canvas structures by ourselves, hammering tent pegs into the earth.

I can still remember having to cross a wide river at camp. I hated heights. I was, and still am, a bit of a physical wimp. Naturally, I was terrified, staring up at a high, narrow log branch we had to hold to get across the water. But the older girls always took the younger ones under their wings, helping us see what we could and could not do. I made it across, scared out of my wits, but it was a great feeling of achievement when I touched the opposite bank. Those messy experiences are real memories, and were, unbeknown to us, teaching us how to build and work together, infinitely more valuable than following a bizarre TikTok trend.

We would go on organised trips to visit zoos, and represent our unit at summer fetes. I remember helping out at the cake stall at Barnes Common; I think we ate more than we sold. But it was a perfect bridge between fun and responsibility.

It was a bit of a prototype sisterhood. Like any true sisterhood, it was not always easy. At one point, Melissa hit it off with another girl, and they went off together for weeks. I suddenly found myself with no one to talk to. It felt like overwhelming heartbreak at that age. But it forced me to mix, to adapt, and to find my footing within the wider group.

I left at 14, on the cusp of true teenage-dom, desperate for night clubs and the decadent years that followed. My time in the guides gave me a valuable toolkit for life. The leaders didn’t just teach us how to build fires or tie knots; they taught a wayward girl how to navigate boundaries, deal with rejection, and learn to compromise and cooperate. I may have outgrown the badges, but I will never forget the inner strength and confidence it has given me.

Original source The Girl Guides saved me from myself

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